we went for sailing lessons today- at least DD did.. DS wasn’t old enough so he got to hang out with me at Costco. Whoopee. Actually- he had a pretty good time. I cannot get over the different dynamic there is when i have just one child with me. I really ENJOY them/ I feel less like referee or arbiter of all that is fair in the world- who got the bigger sample of cheesecake or the purple gummy bear , etc.

So at Costco he got to have a whole chicken fingers and fries to himself- and learned he didn’t need a whole one anyway.
He got all my samples … was his lucky day they were giving out dubble bubble bubble gum and a whole tootsie pop. Made up for the brie last week.
We had a nice time chatting- very relaxing not have 2 different conversations at the same time. I didnt realize how stressful it is for me to hold two entirely different conversation with 2 people at the same time. no wonder my brain hurts. Was pleasant hearing what my 4 year old had to say without being interrupted by older sibling- and better was the no shreiking for my attention.

I am not sure what I learned from this- I know I like to spend one on oe time but what is happening when we are al togehter that makes it so stressful? Why is it the tree of use will be in a room for an hour an dwhen I get up to go to the bathrrom all hell breaks loose?
What message is being given>? Does he like to stir up trouble when I am gone? Done she provoke him? Does my presence do something?
I wonder because I would like to have some of the peace I have when it is just 2 of us and have it translate over to when there are 3 of us.