I had a friend a long time ago tel me something that rang so true- however at times I forget it when I need to remember it most. She talked about how most of our anger and frustration came from fear- fear of losing something, fear of pain, fear of unknown.

We have had some unusual stress in our life. It seem like everything that could go wrong- has gone wrong. Cars breaking down, new house issues, kids out of whack, and some enormous financial pressures. As a result my husband and I have been bickering- a lot.
Today I say down and really though hard about how to fix where we are at- blaming each other- hurt feelings, sniping, bitterness and the rest. I just can’t seem to make it right and I think the thing my husband needs most is something I don’t want to give him. He needs me to validate him- telling him he is doing the “right” thing, be proud of some sacrifices he feels he is making.
If it were my children I wouldn’t think twice about it. I can;t even give my husband the same accord I would give my kids. Why?
The way he is reacting to pressure is with anger, Lots of sniping and criticizing and more. Is it anger? I though so until it donned on me that the anger he feels is at himself. He is afraid. The fear of letting us down- letting me down. Fear that he isn’t a good enough husband or father or fear he may fail. This in turn comes out in burst of anger .
And my reaction- well it has been tor react. How is this working for me? It isn’t. Makes him feel worse and even more of a failure and it escalates. If this were happening with one of my children I could see it clearly- but I just didn’t see it in my husband.
I will remember this over the next days and weeks and try not to react to the anger and work on seeing his fears.

I came across this article about coffee for sale - a steep 25.00 for 12 oz. Why does it cost so much? Becasue its picked by monkeys! I am not kidding.

The coffee is being sold by Vancouver’s 49th Parallel Coffee Roasters and the beans are picked rhesus macaque monkeys in South India. The monkeys pick only the best berries, eat the fit surrounding the coffee bean d and store int heir mouth. The beans are cleaned and ready for roasting. ( Yukkkkk!)

The SL 795 will be available in the company’s Kitsilano store at 2152 West 4th Ave. beginning tomorrow.

“It is only in limited amounts,” said Piccolo. “This is a unique discovery and we want out customers to have great coffee.”

Piccolo expects the 12-ounce bags, which sell for $25, to sell out quickly.

I am thinking about the ethics of this- We have cows and horses do labour- not sure why making monkeys work seems odd to me.
Do they have a union? Who is making sure these mneky are treated fairly? What does PETA think about this?

One of homeschool groups is having a potluck Friday night. I generally look forward to them and this one I am so-so about. My husband has been away on business and I have been driving kids around and spending a lot of times with other homeschooling families socializing. Feel like I need a bit of down time. I love our friends and other homeschool kids- just feel a bit out of balance. Maybe I just need to see my husband.

I have to make a dessert to share and trying to come up with something different than my usual brownies. I thought I might get adventurous and make chocolate eclairs. I don’t think they are that hard and not something you see very day.

I most like will end up making lem squares. My sister-in-law makes a kind of neat dish- crushed up Ritz crackers, sprinkle Skor bar but on top and pour can of sweeten condensed milk over top and bake. Sounds weird but they are delicious. They are pricey to make and I think the Ritz crackers may have trans fats, I will have to check. Really want a big WOW factor… These pot lucks are good place to experiment with new recipes.

I am looking at the theme for this blog and think I HATE it, hate the colours, hate the layout, everything. I am in a bit of a funk. I avid putting in new themes because it takes so long to get them just right. I initially installed this blog for another person- who never used it and now I have to revamp.

Any theme idea appreciated! I prefer 3 columns and with widgets.

My almost 5 year ls son has a bit of a screen addiction. Since her was quite small he has always loved movies, TV and now video games, When he was three he carried around a little DVD player so a movie was always close at hand.

I lean toward unschooling and try not to get bent out of shape over it. The last couple of weeks I will admit i have been mildly concerned. I do not restrict the time the kids spend on TV, computer or video games and have no intention of doing so. I will however re-direct or engage with them if I think its because of boredom. They will almost always say yes to the park, a swim or a hike.
I don’t think the concept of unschooling is to disengage with your kids an leave them on their own ( at least when they are small) to flounder. You need to expose then to stuff- even if it means put out some paints and paper on the table and hang back.
Anyway- I digress- would be too difficult to put all my thoughts about unschooling and children into one post.

I was starting to get a bit worried about the amount of time my son is spending playing video games. When I get doubts like these it helps to read information by othre unschoolers. I particularily like Joyfully Rejoycing ( Joce Fetteroll) who writes a an article, My son plays Nintendo all dayabout just this dilemma.

The article is very long and worth reading even if video games are not an issue here are a few quotes:

A guess would be that games make him feel powerful and competent. The world is not a friendly place for wee little kids. They want to do so much and rules and society and even their 4 yo bodies prevent them from doing what they want to do. But games they can do. They can beat the bad guy. Or get the car around the track faster than anyone. Or collect hundreds of gold coins.

Some kids have desires that are in keeping with what they can do physically and socially. Some kids don’t. For instance some kids are perfectly fine accepting the pace at which they learn to ride a bike. Some kids want to be able to ride well before they have the mental and physical development to be able to do it. And it’s frustrating to them.

Isn’t Joyce great?

Here is a good “homeschool” freebie- great for boys who like to collect cards.
Good way to discuss Olympics, Canadian Mint and marketing.
Get a free Vancouver 2010 Collector Card while supplies last.

* Fields marked * are mandatory
* Limited one of each card per household
* Shipped at the end of the campaign
* Only available for distribution in Canada

http://www.mint.ca/collectorcard/en-ca/collector.aspx

I was at a party on Sunday - it was a birthday party. I was thinking about whether I should send a thank-you card or not. Do you send a thank-you card when you are a guest at a birthday party? I might phone or send an email.. but are email thank-yous tacky?
Lately I have been in the habit of making a conscious effort to send Thank-yous out and feeling very high and mighty :-). The absolute KEY to being on top sending out thank-yous is to have the cards and stamps on hand. You can buy
photo cards and thank-you card and have them “just in case”. For years I would just go and buy a card when the even called for it.. like a sympathy card or thank-you or birthday.. then I realized that I sent out about a quarter of the cards I MEANT to - mainly because I didn’t have them.
Cards are just a question of being polite- even though it is good manners to send out a thank-you. Cards and letter make people feel good. It validates them. It makes you feel good. Getting a thank-you in the mail reminds the party giver or gift giver of the effort they put into it and lets them know YOU know that that went to the trouble and you appreciate it.

Your kids seeing you doing this and the learn that it something they can do as well. We often will sit down and make up a batch of cards… Not just Christmas but anytime.

Woke up with flu this morning.. blech. I am not sure way but whenever I get cold my husband gets pneumonia.. Its like I can’t be sick without getting trumped or just get sick and have someone look after things.

We will often IM each other to communicate.. This morning I was on my PC when he got up and he asked me how I was - said I was sick and then.. yes, Me too! Argh. Guess no one will be bring me neocitran today are making kids lunches.. in fact I might be taking care of kids pus him today.

For those who may be Interested in the history of Passover and what it measn to Jewish people- this is an informative site :
Passover.

Many online coupon and freebie sites will have some hidden “freebies” that work well for homeschooling families. Check them out and send away for free stuff. I will ALWAYS use a wb based email service and have sent to business ot PO Box. If you ask for freebies you will likely be inundated with mail for life.

Popular coupon sitePicaboo coupons has list of freebies many homeschoolers can take advantage of e.g. free puzzles, toys , maps and printables given away by companies. Many of these sites have coupon codes that are great for buying online. I look for deals at Target, BestBuy, Lego and Wal-mart where I might by things like video games and craft supplies anyway and save on shipping or get an unadvertised deal.

Do you have a favorite freebie site? Let us know!